Friday, October 12, 2012

My (unorthodox) Car Meditation

I like driving home on a night like this.. the night is quiet, the air is chill and the road is a nice smooth drive. My soul is at peace. Bliss... :)
I like driving home on a night like this. It feels relaxed, like my soul is at it's natural state. Quiet. No more deadline to rush, no all sorts of people to deal with, no clutters. Just be.

And then in this natural state, i find that i could be thinking about things or not thinking about things. Feeling relaxed and at the same time feeling an ache.

An ache.. i mean an ache in the heart. How could this be? I don't know how to describe it. It's not like i'm sad, or feeling sorrow or anything.. i just felt an ache... Sometimes, i like to think that perhaps we have more than one consciousness that operates separately in our body. Such that, here i am feeling relaxed, i can at the same time noticed the ache in my heart. How strange.. And perhaps, it is in quiet moment like this, that i can sense this even more acutely. 

I just google the definition of ache. It is defined as such:

1. A dull, steady pain. See Synonyms at pain.
2. A longing or desire; a yen.
3. A painful sorrow.

So, could it be a painful sorrow that's embedded in me for the longest time? That on a night like this, when everything is at peace and on a natural state, the sorrow had felt safe to emerge? Or could it be a longing.. feelings i am trying to suppress and be zen about. Or maybe acting zen but not really being zen. hmm. whatever..

Anyway, on a night like this. I don't need to think so much. Just feel and observe...  the calmness, the ache, the peace, the bliss.... ya.. and of course, the road. heheh.